The Game that Matters Most
Like all Alabama fans, I hate Auburn. When Rhonda was born, someone said her hair was auburn colored, and I said, "No, it's not!" I don't care what you call that color, it's not that! By the way, do you know how to get an Auburn grad to stop hanging around on your front porch? Pay him for the pizza!
Anyone, although I hate Auburn, the game that I most want to win every year is against the Viles of Knoxville. That partly comes from growing up among the prison jumpsuit clad ranks (and I do mean rank) of Big Orange fans. This was the game every year that brought me the most grief if we lost. This was the game every year that brought me the most joy and opportunities to rub it in if we won. Fortunately when I was in high school, we won every year.
Lately UT's program has been in decline, but until recently they were still beating us. Now the tables have turned. Phat Phil Fulmer and his box of jelly doughnuts are about out of ideas. In fact, if we win tonight, he's almost assured of a losing season, and probably getting fired. No one on the planet deserves that fate more. His cowardly (and almost certainly illegal) underhand deal with the NCAA to bust Bama in exchange for overlooking his own cheating cost us dearly. But the Tide has turned. We're heading to Knoxville to put a whipping on the Viles. I can't wait till kickoff.